First off, what are microaggressions?
Often quick or seemingly easy to ignore,
microaggressions are brief and/or subtle
actions, remarks, or visual cues in our
everyday interactions that communicate
negative ideas or stereotypes about
a group of people – usually a socially
marginalized group. While they take
many forms, if you’ve encountered one
of the comments or actions below, you’ve
encountered a microaggression:
- I love your accent! Where are you
from?
- Why am I so blind today?
- That is so gay.
- Touching someone's hair without
consent.
- Repeatedly interrupting or forgetting
to include someone.
- Crossing the street to avoid someone.
Why they are hard to address.
Microaggressions are by nature small and
can be easily explained away. They aren’t
perpetrated by one particular population
or group – they are perpetrated by many
different people, and many people simply
aren’t aware that they are inflicting a
microaggression. In addition,
microaggressions aren’t
always delivered in
words – they can be
a gesture, facial
expression, or
other subtle
forms of body
language.
Some reasons why they are harmful.
While they might seem inconsequential,
microaggressions are cumulative
to the people on the receiving end.
And cumulatively, the effect of
microaggressions can be overwhelming
and damaging.
Think about this in physical terms, for
example, receiving a minor abrasion like
a paper cut. If you receive one, you will
likely be a bit uncomfortable, but it will
seem minor and you will probably heal
and move on. But if you receive multiple
paper cuts per day for weeks or even years,
it could seriously damage your health.
Other reasons why microaggressions are
harmful? They are a constant reminder that
someone doesn’t belong or isn’t worthy,
and they also subtly normalize prejudice
and reinforce it. They do real
psychological damage to
people who regularly
experience them.
How to respond to microaggressions.
Microaggressions exist from the viewpoint
of the:
- Aggressor (the person who
perpetrates them);
- Victim (the person who is subject to
them); or
- Witness (the person who sees them
happen).
Responding to microaggressions is
complex – it can take many forms and
it is an ongoing process that requires
continual learning. As a starting point,
here is how you can respond from each
of these three positions.
Aggressor: Let’s say you’ve perpetrated
a microaggression and the person on the
receiving end – the victim – becomes
upset with you. Consciously deciding
to do the following will help you grow,
though it might be difficult.
- Frame the confrontation as a valuable
experience of receiving feedback
and recognize that this feedback is
important.
- Watch your fragility. Exercise agency
over how much your emotions
dominate the interaction.
- Be aware that intentions do not equal
impacts, nor do they erase impacts.
- Don’t disagree with what you’re being
told, particularly if it is coming from
the victim. They are telling you about
the impact of your actions on them. On
this, they are always right. Get curious.
- Thank them for what they have given
you. Commit to taking it away and
thinking about it. Get help to learn
more – Google, read, call a friend.
- Apologize, take this learning to heart,
make a change, and don’t dwell on
the negative emotions.
Victim: Remember to take care of yourself
first. Remove yourself from the situation,
get help, or confront – depending on what
is good for you first.
- Remember it is not your job to fix
the world.
- Remember that you have a right to
speak up to make situations safe for
yourself. Don’t let them tell you that
you’re being difficult.
Witness: It’s important to recognize that
noticing and addressing microaggressions
are your responsibility as much as it is
anybody else’s.
- Educate yourself about the histories,
realities and reactions of marginalized
folks, so that you can recognize a
microaggression when you see one.
- Allow for the possibility that people
can learn from mistakes and that
aggressors are not necessarily
unredeemable.
- Be aware of your privilege (or lack
thereof). Don’t dismiss the risk to
yourself of intervening and don’t
exaggerate it either. Use your privilege
to take appropriate risk.
- Make a response that is proportional
to the wrong-doing.
- Call out power if it needs to be
confronted.
In general, a strategy for lessening
microaggressions is to increase your
knowledge of others’ perspectives. This
will involve ongoing work on your part
to understand your actions in relation
to others. This is a complex journey of
learning and growth; some of the forms it
can take can include reading perspectives
from identities other than yours, watching
movies about broader topics, or building
deep diverse friendships.
You can also grow your interpersonal skills.
This could involve learning and looking for
social cues that signal discomfort, asking
for feedback and communicating that you
welcome it, and building relationships in
which mistakes can be pointed out – all
of these actions can help you lessen
microaggressions.
Aftab Erfan is a long-standing scholar-practitioner
in the field of inclusion and
social justice, currently serving as the City of
Vancouver (BC) first Chief Equity Officer.
Originally published to CPABC’s newsroom
and republished with permission.
This article appears in the spring 2021 issue of the Washington CPA magazine. Read more here.